Be Still or Be Stilled

I know, I know.  I was supposed to post more about my She Speaks weekend next.  And I will.  But today, I am taking a small detour...a little challenge.  I am joining a bunch of writers and giving myself five minutes to write about a topic.  No worries.  No editing. Just words.  God's Word never returns void, whether it is taught in five minutes or five hours.  Here we go...

Be still and know that I am God.  It is a command that has sweet reward.  To say "Enough!" to the busyness of this life and settle in with Him is always a good thing. Knowing that He is God.  He is faithful.  And He is Enough to cover our "Enough!"  Praise You, Jesus!


So, maybe you are familiar with that verse.  Maybe you surrender to that command often.  Maybe not so much.  Regardless, you hear the command and the call.  


What about being "stilled?"  See, if you know me, being still is quite difficult for me.  And so even though I hear the command and the calling to be still and know that He is God, I wrestle.  I am restless.  


Zephaniah 3: 17 has a part that says,  "He will quiet you with His love."  That means He will STILL you.  He will "leave off speaking"  with his love (unspeakable love, tender mercies.)  Have you ever had someone's silence minister great love to you?  No words are necessary.  I picture my child that is crying uncontrollably and when I hug him closely, he begins to breathe and settle. That, my friend, is being STILLED.

So, Be still or be stilled.  

Unwrap that gift of His enoughness today!

Kelli

http://www.incourage.me/2011/07/five-minute-friday-still.html

Preparing for the Amazing

The day I finally decide to sign up for the Proverbs 31 She Speaks conference, I go to the website only to find out the conference is full.  Bummer.  I am placed on a waiting list that is who knows how long. Wait?  Wait.  That was mid-April.
May came and went.  Nothing.


June 9, I receive a phone call.  My name was up on the waiting list.  I have 24 hours to decide.  God says go...through the voices of some wonderful people in my life.


What now?  Do I prepare for a speaker evaluation group?  No, I am on the waiting list for that.  Do I prepare to meet with a publisher?  No, I am not ready for that.  


June 23,  I find out that I am in a speaker evaluation group, and that there are publisher appointments still open.  In a moment of crazy ridiculous boldness, I make two appointments with publishers.  I know that this means I will have to work on a proposal and a pitch sheet for my bible study.  The conference is a month away.  I am insane.


June 25, I leave to go on a week vacation to the beach with my family.  God clearly says do not work on She Speaks stuff while I am with my family at the beach.  The days are counting down.  I am resistant, but obedient.


July 2, I return from the beach.  I am rested.  It's a good thing because re-entry is always hard.  Laundry, emails, and snail mail demand my attention.  What about a book proposal or a pitch sheet for my publisher meetings?  And as I read the She Speaks attender Facebook page, I realize that I also need business cards, an awesome blog, a speaker promotional sheet, a twitter account, a Facebook page, the list goes on.  What????  There is no way.  

July 4, I wake up with a spring in my step.  I will do it all!  I begin a new blog (my old one had 3 entries in two years!); I create a Facebook page; I begin working on business cards, speaker biosheet, and my other things for my publisher meeting.


July 5, I wake up sick.  Stomach is all messed up.  Mind is spinning. God says STOP.  Though I don't take any medicine, the Lord puts me in a deep sleep for about 8 hours.  I worry I will not sleep that night, but I sleep another 8 hours. What is the Lord teaching me?

Early in the morning Joshua and all the Israelites set out from Shittim and went to the Jordan, where they camped before crossing over.  After three days the officers went throughout the camp, giving orders to the people: "When you see the ark of the covenant of the LORD your God, and the priests, who are Levites, carrying it, you are to move out from your positions and follow it.  Then you will know which way to go, since you have never been this way before. But keep a distance of about a thousand yards between you and the ark; do not go near it." 
Joshua told the people, "Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will do amazing things among you." Joshua 3: 1-5


"Follow Me, Kelli.  Then you will know which way to go, since you have never been this way before...and consecrate yourself, set yourself apart for me, for tomorrow I will do AMAZING things among you."


July 6, and for the next 14 days, I am awakened every morning between 4 and 5 am.  And I am not a morning person.  It is as if this is the time that God is using to consecrate me.  I am prompted to pray for people in my church, people in my community group, women that will be at She Speaks. God and I also have some great conversations during this time.  I share with Him my worries, my needs, my wants, my dreams.  He reminds me of His deep love for me and His unique plan for my life.  


I write several more blog posts.  I work on my 3 and 5 minute messages for speaker evaluation. I create business cards, a speaker biosheet, and a pitch sheet for the publisher.  I  create a Facebook page and open a Twitter account.  I read about writing book proposals, but am not able to finish one.  But more than all that, I consecrate myself, I prepare myself, I ready myself for what God wants to do with me.  I spend time in His Word, on my knees, and in worship.


July 20, I meet with my community group.  This is an awesome group of people that prays for one another.  I share with them how God is waking me up every morning at 4 or 5 a.m.  to pray, listen, and commune with Him.  I talk about how incredibly sweet the time is.  And then I tell them how very tired I am.  That I need one good night's rest before I leave.  I am leaving the next day.  


July 21, I wake up.  The clock reads 7 a.m.  I have been asleep for 8.5 hours.  Wow!  Thank you, God.  I receive 3 emails that day from people in my community group.  They were all awakened between 4 and 5 am.  They took my shift!  After I finish packing my things, I leave for She Speaks.  


...And it is AMAZING.  Stay tuned.  I will tell you more in the days to come.


In the meanwhile, what amazing thing is God preparing you for?  And what is the hardest part about His preparation?


I am praying for you sweet bloggy friends...
May you unwrap many gifts today!


Kelli

There's a Party Going On Right Here

"Or imagine a woman who has ten coins and loses one. Won't she light a lamp and scour the house, looking in every nook and cranny until she finds it? 9 And when she finds it you can be sure she'll call her friends and neighbors: "Celebrate with me! I found my lost coin!' 10 Count on it--that's the kind of party God's angels throw every time one lost soul turns to God."   Luke 15: 8 - 10 (Message)


I will never forget the day that Ryan and I were riding down the road in the "Swagger Wagon,"  aka minivan, and we were discussing my nephew's upcoming baptism.  Ryan was four at the time and had many questions (not unusual) about Jesus, baptism, God, etc.  His main question was, "Can I be bap-i-tized?"  I explained to him that baptism was an outward sign of an inward decision.  That baptism followed accepting Christ into your heart as your Savior and Lord.  He waited a few minutes.  And then I heard him say, "God...Jesus...both of you guys...would you come into my heart?"  "Ok, Mom, now I can get that bap-i-tized thing."  Well, I didn't doubt the Lord drawing Ryan to himself.  I didn't even doubt Ryan's decision.  I wasn't quite sure what to do.  So, I told my husband about it and we decided to just wait and see if Ryan brought it up again.  He didn't.  


Fast forward three and a half years.  I have always felt secure in the fact that the Lord had already started a work in Ryan.  But now that Ryan was older and he was learning more and more, I wanted him to solidify that decision to follow Christ.  The Lord really laid on my heart in January of this year to pray fervently for Ryan to truly understand what it meant to accept Jesus as his Savior.  So, I began to pray.  And I asked others to pray.  I knew God was working.  I could tell by Ryan's prayers, his questions, and his change in behavior.  He went to overnight Kids Camp for the first time this year.  God stirred.  He moved to a third grade Sunday School class with Mama Carol (a kid loving, Scripture teaching, woman of God!) God stirred some more.  


This week is VBS at Christ Community Church.  Last night was my night to teach.  The story:  Jesus' life, death, and resurrection.  I had recruited a friend of mine, Garrett, to help me teach it by portraying Peter.  Garrett did a phenomenal job in sharing how Peter must have felt when he blew it with Jesus...denying him 3 times.  I asked the kids, "Anyone in here ever felt like they blew it?"  Ryan raised his hand and said, "1000 times , Mom, you know it, 'cause you're my Mom."  I smiled.  And then I reminded the kids that God forgives, that God loves them so much that He sent His son Jesus to die for them and their sins, and that He rose again so that we could live forever with Him!  "If you have never accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, tonight's a great night to do that.  If He is calling you, listen to Him."  I prayed with the kids and dismissed them.  On the way out, Ryan came and hugged me and said, "Mom, I want to ask Jesus into my heart and...I want to be digested as soon as I can!"  "Digested?"  "You know, Mom, the water thing?"  "Oh...Baptized."  "Yes!  That's it!"


We came home.  He shared the news with Bekah and Daddy.  We all four (now a house full of Christ followers!) sat down as Ryan prayed to receive Christ into his heart.  He told Jesus he wanted Him to control his soul and his life.  (His words.)  And then the three of us took turns praying over him and blessing him.  Chris (my man) thanked God that his son was now also his brother.  Bekah prayed for Ryan to "fully embrace his relationship with Christ."  I prayed that God would bless him and have him do AMAZING things for the kingdom.  It was GLORIOUS!  


And yes, there's a party going on right here!  A Celebration to last throughout the years! (Forever!) Won't you join us at the party?  We have a place reserved especially for you.


Thanks for letting me share my heart today.  You all are such a blessing to me!
Kelli

From Attitude to Gratitude

It was Saturday morning.  And then it happened.  You know this sound.  It is the sound of little people feet who like to get up early and like your company as well.  Sigh.  I decide to fake sound sleep.  Little feet stop.  Little feet turn around.  Little hands close door.  Yes!  I did it.  I go back to sleeping, not faking it this time.

Twenty minutes later, scenario repeats.  Only this time, little  big voice announces that he has made me breakfast in bed.  I am foggy.  He continues to tell me that his daddy taught him that this was the way you make your wife happy.  Wait!  What kind of breakfast did he make me all by himself?  Daddy is gone to work.  Tween sister is at a sleepover.  Yikes.  I am wide awake now.  And then he presents.  Slightly burnt crunchy yummy toast with four ounces ample squeezable grape jelly and nine manhandled lightly washed blueberries.  Yes, there were nine.  I counted them.

Wow.  He is thrilled to serve me.  I am proud to be his mom.  He is so proud of himself.  I am...in desperate need of coffee.  (Especially with the sugar high I am feeling from the jelly right now.)

It was a beautiful moment.  My almost eight year old is growing up.  We relish in the moment together.  I drink my coffee and eat my lovingly prepared breakfast in bed.

Twenty minutes later, it happens.  You know "it."  "It" is the attitude that creeps in after we have done something nice for someone.   "It" is the attitude of reciprocity.  And "it" came on with a vengeance in my son.  He wants to know if I will take him to ToysRUs to get a toy because he made breakfast for me.  Whaaaa?  My motherly instinct of teaching life lessons in the middle of life crises kicks in.  "Son, you made breakfast for me because you wanted to do something nice for me, to show your love for me, right?  Not to get something in return.  We do things for people because we love them and want to serve them, not  to gain leverage for purposes of negotiation."  (Ok, so I didn't say that last part, but I wanted to!)


He makes a sour face.  He leaves the room.


Twenty minutes later, he returns.  (He kind of works in 20 minute shifts.)  He is now fixated on the idea of going to TRU and getting a prize.  He has now positioned himself firmly with a sense of entitlement.


Patience wavering.  Life lesson #2.  I give him a sheet of paper and write at the top, "What I am thankful for..."  I tell him it is hard to have this "attitude" of entitlement if we take time to think about and be grateful for what we already have.

He begins his list.  He gets frustrated.  He throws away the first paper.  He starts the second paper and this is what he comes up with:

Ritzy and Cookie are our dogs.  Bunk Bed comes in third, with food, pool, upstairs, and trampoline following.  And then...my personal favorite...he is thankful for having a lot (not just a little) TALINT.  So true, my sweet boy.  And then lots of toys with oh, and a family there at the end.

Gratitude.  When we realize the amazing ways in which God has blessed us.  When we realize we have everything we need and a lot of what we want as well.  When we gain perspective.

Gratitude has an uncanny habit of replacing "attitude."  Because it is really hard to have a sense of entitlement and need of reciprocity when you realize that the Ultimate Giver has lavished His love, grace and mercy on you.  Undeservedly.

Lord, I know that I am so often like a child desiring recognition and reciprocity for my service.  I can also be very needy and "wanty" not realizing what I have already been blessed with.  Give me an attitude of gratitude that I might see the amazing gifts that You have graciously given me.

"Be cheerful no matter what; pray all the time; thank God no matter what happens.  This is the way God wants you who belong to Christ Jesus to live."  1 Thess. 5: 16 - 18 (Msg)

So, do you need an attitude change?  What would your gratitude list look like?

How God Used the Food Network to Speak to Me

Ok, so I admit it.  I am a big Food Network fan.  There's something in me that enjoys watching others prepare gourmet meals.  Maybe I think that by watching, it will somehow magically change my cooking success or better yet, that watching it releases me from ever attempting such feats as a cook.  My favorite FN show is the Next Food Network Star.   So, I know the show isn't terribly spiritual.  But in a recent episode, God used the panel of judges' statements to finalists to remind me of some key spiritual truths.  

"You have so many parts of life that only you can talk about.  See where that leads you."  

Yes, this was said on the Food Network.  It moved me...spiritually.  It was if God was saying the same thing to me... "Why do you compare yourself to others?  Why do you wish for someone else's platform?  I have created you and shaped you just the way you are and you have a unique life story that only you can tell.  Stop trying to be someone else or speak and write like someone else.  Just be you...and see where that leads you."    

"Since this is the kind of life we have chosen, the life of the Spirit, let us make sure that we do not just hold it as an idea in our heads or a sentiment in our hearts, but work out its implications in every detail of our lives. That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original." Galatians 5:25 - 26 (MSG)

"It's interesting to me when we find these finalists who are running from what is in their bones."

Not chicken bones, mind you.  These finalists were detouring from their passion, their backgrounds, their callings.  Why do we run from the very thing that God has placed in us...our calling?  Is it because of boredom, laziness, neglect, comparison to others, disobedience, or my personal favorite, FEAR?  Must I remind you of our friend Jonah who was called to go to Ninevah to preach the gospel and "he joined those going to Tarshish -- as far away from God as he could get."  Whatever the reason for running away from our calling, we need to run to the One who called us.  He is there to meet us, to equip us, to encourage us, to cast out fear.  Remember, "The One who calls you is FAITHFUL and He will do it."  1 Thess. 5:24

"She shows a lot of passion, she just doesn't have any focus."

Ouch.  I know this statement wasn't directed toward me personally, but it sure could have been.  The female finalist receiving this critique was very passionate about food, cooking, and even the show, but she lacked knowing who she really was and focusing on her unique perspective.  I have to admit watching her, she was all over the place.  She lacked focus.  I feel this way often.  I show a lot of passion for God, for His Word, for my family, for ministry, but I often lack focus.  I want to be a passionate woman of God...with focus.  God's Word tells us the only way this is possible is to focus on Him, get to know Him.  He provides the passion...and the focus.  Paul writes this for the church at Ephesus:  

"I ask—ask the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory—to make you intelligent and discerning in knowing him personally, your eyes focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is he is calling you to do..."  Ephesians 1:15 (MSG)

So, what part of this spiritualization of the Next Food Network Star resonated with you?  Do you stray from your originality...your story?  Do you run from your calling and if you do, why?  And finally, do you lack focus?  Comment below! 

The Dream of the Gift

Three years ago I had a dream. The vividness of it brings it ever close today. 

The dream.  I walk into a room. And I see Him...Jesus.   He is beautiful. He is sitting on a beautiful throne. And He is holding something. As I look closer I see that He is holding a beautifully wrapped gift.  It was wrapped in exquisite paper and topped with a perfect huge bow.  I look into His eyes and ask, "Is that gift for me?" He peers into my eyes, into my soul, and gently gestures me to come closer. And then I wake up.

When I had that dream three years ago, I was going through one of the most painful and difficult times in my life. That painful situation had left me feeling raw, numb, and abandoned. I felt unworthy, inadequate, unusable.  Though I had been very involved in ministry, this situation had made me seriously doubt my identity, my mission, and whether or not I would ever be involved in ministry again.  

Then the dream.  Though it took me a while to process what God was saying to me, I realized that His main message was that the painful trial I was going through was indeed a gift. A gift only realized if I came closer to the Gift Giver Himself. That's why when I asked Him in the dream if the gift was for me, He only responded with a gesture to come closer to him.  My trial a gift?  I didn't understand, but I trusted that He would continue to reveal Himself to me.

That painful situation necessitated that I leave a very comfortable zone and head straight into one that was unknown, uncomfortable, even unraveling.  I enjoy new things, new challenges, but I don't enjoy discomfort.  I am just being honest.  But I was devastated and needed restoration and rebirth.  As Ann Voskamp shared in a recent post, "It's only in the uncomfortable places that we can experience the tenderness of the Comforter." It was in that place that I received the gift of His intimate Presence. He longs to meet us all there. He is the God of all Comfort, the Father of Compassion.  

2 Corinthians 1: 3 - 5, says "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comes alongside of us when we go through hard times, and before you know, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us."  (NIV, MSG)

Looking back now, I realize what a gift that painful experience truly was. For it was in that pain, in that open wound, that I sought the comfort of my Savior in a way I never had before. His Presence was soothing, healing, and life-giving.  He was IT for me...and He was enough.  He was truly my All in All.  He restored my soul and my mind.  He reminded me that my identity could only be found in Him, not in other people, titles, or even ministry.  He not only restored my mission and ministry, He expanded it!  

Unwrapping the gifts of His presence, purpose, and power has now become the message I feel He has given me to share with others. Sharing and marketing that message is another trip out of my comfort zone! However, this time, I take the trip out of my comfort zone, not out of obligation, but out of desire. Because I know that being out of my comfort zone means being in the arms of the God of all comfort. And that's a gift!

As I write this, I am praying and preparing to go to a conference in July offered by Proverbs 31 Ministries called, "She Speaks Conference." I have known about this conference a couple of years, but have been unable scared to attend. Lysa TerKeurst, author of Made To Crave and When Women Say Yes To God, is one of the women on the Proverbs 31 team and I look forward to learning lots from her and many other women.  The conference is for speakers, writers, and leaders "to receive the tools and the confidence to answer God's call on your life." I consider it such a blessing to be able to go and I look forward to listening to God and being obedient to His leadership in my life.  

I am asking for your prayers as I attend the conference.  I am on the Speakers Track and will present a short message to two different groups for evaluation.  I am excited about receiving feedback and encouragement from women with similar callings and love for the Lord.  In addition, I am FINALLY meeting with someone to discuss the bible study I wrote based on 2nd Corinthians.  And it scares me to death, but I also have two meetings with publishers to "pitch" my bible study.  I don't know if it's because I am turning 40 in October, but I have gotten really brave  crazy these days.  As I write this, my heart beats out of my chest.  Literally- and I am sitting in a chair!

Please pray for God's divine wisdom, guidance, and timing in all these things.  And do me a favor, if you  will, and click to follow my blog on the left hand side of the blog posts.  They say this is important when trying to pitch a book.  Anyway, I hope to blog at least twice a week on God's gifts to us.  I hope you will join me in unwrapping those gifts...  as we move closer to the Gift Giver.

I attended the conference since this posting and it was truly life-changing.  If you would like to read about my trip, you can go to He Speaks and She Listens.  

Any recent gifts from God that you want to share in the comments?

I'd love to know what they are!

Much love and gratitude for your friendship,

Kelli